Discovering Who You're Not

Is your curiosity soul deep?

What if the “You” you thought you were was not the real you?

In any esoteric form of spirituality, this has been a central question for millenia, but more recently in human history this has also become a psychological question. Since Freud pioneered the exploration of the unconscious, the degree to which it runs our lives is increasingly apparent.

Marketers know for a fact that we make purchase decisions emotionally and then only secondarily justify the choice mentally, yet for most of us this is entirely unconscious. If billions of dollars of profit-driven research has proven this, then doesn’t it stand to reason that we make all decisions this way?

And what would it mean to you if it did? What responsibility would you have for discovering the contents of your unconscious?


What if the degree to which your unconscious is running your life is the degree to which you don’t notice your core emotional drives and how a part of you copes with them?


And what if that coping made “you” able to manage life, but never truly thrive?


What if the “You” you identify as is mostly not the real you at all, but rather the “You” you had to become to adapt to deficits in your childhood? This is not only theory. It’s entirely possible to experience the difference between the truest you and who you are now.

It is not, however, for the faint of heart. Sifting through your beliefs, attitudes, behaviors, and worldviews with intense scrutiny is some of the most difficult work there is. It’s also the most rewarding.

The truest You flows through life with greater ease, less attachment, more trust in Life, more energy, and more enjoyment. Without this You, the alternative is the attempt to improve the inauthentic You, which has limited results but is much more comfortable.

For people who’ve dead-ended the self-improvement project and desire to find the version of themselves which needs no improving, this course is for you.

Josef Shapiro

Since I first trained as a business coach at EMyth in 2002, I’ve been a change agent for thousands of business leaders and managers. Coaching is a fast-growing industry, but it's also very young. I'm a perennial student and never satisfied with the pace of human change because I think we can do better. For me, it’s an unsolved mystery and the needless suffering inside workplaces around the world hangs in the balance. It affects us all. Learn more at clearandopen.com.

Course curriculum

  • 1

    1. What's Your Protector's Style?

    • What's Your Protector's Style? (11.30.23)

    • What's Your Protector's Style? (11.30.23)

    • Article on Protector Styles (with added Spiritual Bypasser)

    • Article Read and Talk

    • Article Read and Talk

  • 2

    2. Altruism, Transcendence, and Control

    • Altruism, Transcendence, and Control (12.7.23)

    • Altruism, Transcendence, and Control (12.7.23)

    • Related Article Part 1: Where Your Values Came From

    • Related Article Part 2: Where Your Values Came From

  • 3

    3. Disidentifying the Protector From Mind

    • Disidentifying the Protector From Mind (12.14.23)

    • Disidentifying the Protector From Mind (12.14.23)

  • 4

    4. We Are All Mad Here: The Truth About Mental Illness

    • We Are All Mad Here (12.21.23)

    • We Are All Mad Here (12.21.23)

  • 5

    5. The Strategic Self's Improvement Project

    • The Strategic Self's Improvement Project (12.28.23)

    • The Strategic Self's Improvement Project (12.28.23)

  • 6

    6. The Seduction of Collectivism

    • Seduction of Collectivism (1.4.23)

    • Seduction of Collectivism (1.4.23)

  • 7

    7. Two Wounds, Two Protection Types

    • Two Wounds, Two Protection Types (1.12.24)

    • Two Wounds, Two Protection Types (1.12.24)

  • 8

    8. Peeling Back Unconscious Strategies

    • Peeling Back Unconscious Strategies (1.19.23)

    • Peeling Back Unconscious Strategies (1.19.23)

    • Bonus Talk: Why Intentions Get Thwarted

    • Bonus Talk: Why Intentions Get Thwarted

  • 9

    9. The Wound-Based Roots of the Patriarchy

    • The Wound-Based Roots of the Patriarchy (1.25.24)

    • The Wound-Based Roots of the Patriarchy (1.25.24)

  • 10

    10. Eyes as the Windows of the Soul

    • Eyes as the Windows of the Soul (2.1.23)

    • Eyes as the Windows of the Soul (2.1.23)

  • 11

    11. To Cope or Not To Cope

    • To Cope or Not To Cope (2.8.24)

    • To Cope or Not To Cope (2.8.24)

  • 12

    12. Finding Authentic Self-Authority

    • Finding Authentic Self-Authority (2.15.24)

    • Finding Authentic Self-Authority (2.15.24)

Membership Saves You $$ on this Course!!

Discovering Who You're Not

Getting to know the "you" you had to become but never truly were.